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The 'Highest' Win Rate Opening
Published 2 months ago • 3 min read
The 'Highest' Win Rate Opening
In honour of 4/20 on Sunday, this week's Chess Openings Tuesday is - you guessed it - on the Bongcloud Attack. Told you I would.
Seen as a joke by some (most), this opening gives you a significant disadvantage by exposing your King and sacrificing castle rights... but if you can pull it off and win, the feeling is something else entirely.
Maybe it's luck, maybe my opponent were playing awful, but every time I've played this opening on ladder (all 3 times), I've won.
So what's up with this opening, and how can it - of all possible openings - actually take you to a new elo 'high'?
Let's find out.
Side note, this week it's a shorter and more humorous email. If you want to seriously learn the Bongcloud... well, you're probably better off just getting the cheat sheet.
The Bongcloud Attack 1. e4 e5 2. Ke2
Yes, it looks daft. And it is daft.
But there's a certain power in this opening.
Namely that people don't know what the f*ck to do when you play it.
There are openings that throw your opponents off balance... and then there's the Bongcloud Attack.
Don't get me wrong, it's a 'bad' opening, and most of the time you will lose if your opponent knows what they are doing.
But when you play it and win... you unlock a whole 'nother level of bragging rights and clout. You join the chess elite.
While the Bongcloud can technically be played with any response from Black, e5 is the most consistent, and we'll be looking at that here.
So, here's the first moves usually look like.
2...Nc6
Popularity: 36%
Queenside Knight gets developed. What do you do? A) Run away like a coward, or B) move your King further into danger? If you chose B, you're among the 16% of people who give Black 68% chance of winning. Brave, but no bueno.
2...Nf6
Popularity: 23%
Oh no, your pawn's under attack! How do you defend? There's a clear defending move... wait, why are you moving your King forward, I meant d3!!
2...d6
Popularity: 14%
Your opponent is so terrified by your King advance, that they just have to defend their pawn in this Pirc Defense variant... well, show them who's boss and develop a piece of your own. Take your pick. And no, you can't develop your King again.
The Reality Of The Bongcloud
Unless you're Magnus Carlsen 'under the influence' or aren't invested in your chess elo, you should avoid playing the Bongcloud. It's not a secret meta strategy to speedrun 2000 elo, sadly.
(Unless you've just hit a bong yourself. In which case, you'll have unlocked the secrets of the chess universe.)
But it can be a fun, challenging opening. Handicapping yourself by 1) exposing your King and 2) sacrificing castling rights is one of the best ways to make your game more challenging without having to face higher elo players.
My advice? If you're playing it for fun and want to win, bring your King back to its starting square.
Who knows, your opponent might respond with Ke7 ;)
I got a bit carried away with memes this week... check out a whole bunch of Bongcloud Attack memes on Instagram (the last one in the post is my favourite):
If you want to be a master of hitting the bong - figuratively speaking - then our Bongcloud Attack cheat sheet is the tool you need. It's like the lighter to your pipe.
This 20-page guide contains everything you need to master it once and for all. Take your Bongcloud to the next level by clicking the button below.
This email newsletter is still something I'm experimenting with and I want to make it as good as possible for you. Let me know what you think so I can improve it.
What did you like?
What didn't you like?
What would you like added?
Is there an opening you'd like covered?
Just reply to this email and let me know!
I'll be back next Tuesday with another chess opening... Until then, keep climbing!
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